NUMBERS

My son Daniel is in the candidacy process for the United Methodist Church. This kid was the prototype for Dennis the Menace. He wasn't a bad kid at all; he could just think of more creative ways to get in trouble than the adults around him could make rules for. So when he called me one Saturday morning and told me he had definitely decided NOT to apply to Law School or become a high school history teacher because he felt he had a 'calling', I cried for three hours.

It's not that he wouldn't make a good one but my son has always had a very soft spot for the downtrodden, the hurt, the sick, the homeless, the disabled.....he is an empathetic kind of kid (he's 25 now) who will inevitably reach out to those who others have forgotten. But I'm getting used to it and have started recording our conversations that I never in my wildest dreams thought would occur.

My son called me this morning and I answered with a cheerful "Hello Son" even though I was very busy with stuff.

In his usual just-needing-to-share way he said "Did you read my (FP) post yet?"

Me: "No, I've been busy."

Dan: "Well I couldn't sleep so I read Numbers."...
 
Me: "is Numbers the name of a book? Like from the TV show?"
 
Dan: "No Mom, Numbers - the book in the Bible."
 
Me: "There's a book in the Bible called Numbers?"
 
Dan: "Yeah, it's right after Deuteronomy."
 
Me: "Is that about stars or something?"
 
Dan: "No. Numbers is all about how Moses gets all pissed off at the Israelites because they were tired of Manna and wanted to go back to Egypt so they could have meat. Moses gets really 'why do I have to put up with this sh!?' and asks God to just shoot him now."
 
Me: "Was that around the part about the golden idol?"
 
Dan: "No Mom that's another book. But God did send them all the meat they could eat but they still complained so God smites them."
 
Me: "Doesn't God do that a lot in the Old Testament? That smiting thing?"

Dan: "Yeah."
 
Me: "You could use that for a sermon like 'Aren't you glad you don't live in Old Testament times? You could be dead."
 
Dan: "The whole thing makes me laugh."

I'm a little unclear how Numbers makes my son laugh and a little uncomfortable that the reason might not be a good one for a minister.