GOD IS A CHEEKY BASTARD

Not my words, the words of the minister-to-be who prompted this blog. Funny thing, except for the anthropomorphism, I have thought that exact thing about Tao.

Of course, the most obvious evidence of God’s (or Tao’s) cheekiness is MY son’s call to ministry in a very problematic (as in very conflicted over the homosexuality as unGodlike issue) United Methodist Church. Some say it’s my fault even because, although I no longer worship a good-looking white guy that sends specific messages from above to guide my day from the moment I get out of bed to take my first pee in the morning to the moment I lay my head down on the pillow where Jesus who loves me protects me throughout the night, I am guilty of raising my son in a Progressive Methodist Church. OK, fair enough. In my defense, I was very careful in my selection, searching for the least traditional, most inclusive Christian church I could find in Tucson in 1996.

When Dan first chose Wesley Theological Seminary, his response to my question about why he chose a seminary SO FAR AWAY FROM HOME (he was accepted to all four of his choices, two of which were a lot closer than Washington DC) was that he felt Wesley might be perhaps a bit more conservative than the two California seminaries or ‘peace-loving’ Boston University School of Theology. Having been raised in a church which did not prepare him for intense Biblical discussion, he wanted to be ready to be Pastor and Teacher for the probable Bible-thumpers he might find in rural Montana to whom his own church upbringing would have zero resonance.

I suspect he figured when he got to Wesley he might have to downplay his own Progressive Christian upbringing in his sandal-wearing, vegan-options-at-church-dinners, Mother-Father God, fully inclusive Methodist church. But not long after moving into the dorm, instead of hiding his woo-woo past, he began posting and collecting an entire photo album on his Facebook page called Favorite Religious Memes. These memes are not for the Christian faint of heart. Many directly hit at the institutional conflicts and concerns that drove me completely away from mainstream Christian denominations for over 20 years.

Since Dan’s entry into seminary, I have learned that there is a secret dark underbelly of Progressive Christianity. Firstly, I learned that the satirical film Dogma about two errant angels is possibly one of seminarians’ most favorite films. The film certainly is irreverent and at one point just plain gross but perhaps ‘dark’ and ‘secret’ are too strong.

Let’s just say unless you are ‘in the loop’ or trying to find religious memes and jokes that satirically handle some of the basic, sometimes deeply divisive, issues of Christian ministry, you might never come across the movie Dogma or the cartoon Coffee with Jesus or the Christian doppelgänger of the satirical online news source The Onion called The Babylon Bee, which styles itself as “Your Trusted Source For Christian News Satire”.  

But the good news for an ex-Christian Taoist fretting about the power of the Christian far right is that there ARE such institutional reactions to the central conflicts and hypocrisies found in all Christian denominations (including Progressive ones). Coffee with Jesus is probably my favorite. Found on Radio Free Babylon’s website, the 4-panel cartoon deals with real issues of every person of faith, regardless of position on the continuum of Christian faith traditions. 

In the cartoon below, a very approachable Jesus addresses the problematic issue of loving your neighbor as yourself. Carl, one of Jesus’s coffee regulars and wearing a hat with the logo ‘The Scapers’ asks Jesus “...when you say ‘neighbor’ are you talking about the people on my street or people in Canada, Mexico and the Caribbean?” Jesus’ reply is an unequivocal “Yes.” It seems pretty clear that the Coffee Jesus doesn't want Muslims and Jamaicans being excluded from Christian love either.

In another cartoon, Jesus and a very white, middle-class Christian couple who appear frequently chatting with Jesus over morning coffee, discuss the miracle of Jesus turning water into wine. Jesus claims this miracle “just happened that way” and his Mom kind of made him do it. Everyone knows how much boys love their Moms.

The Babylon Bee tackles faith issues in much the way the highly political The Onion tackles politics, scandals, the Dugginses current crisis of faith and just about everything else in the mainstream news. Take something that is really newsworthy and turn it on its head in a way that makes the reader think it just might BE the news (I confess to checking to make sure some real news stories DON'T come from The Onion). Babylon Bee article titles range from “Local Woman Searches Bible In Vain For Beloved ‘Footprint in the Sand’ Passage” to “Gridlock Reached as Two Men Both Certain God Told them To Date Same Girl".

Now I know for a fact that Shakespeare is credited with providing an awful lot of common phrases so maybe Local Woman should search Shakespeare instead of the Bible for that passage. And, frankly, we’ve all met those who are convinced God has told them to do or to be something totally in conflict with our own beliefs so either the Bible God is being cheeky with the two gents OR just possibly God doesn’t work that way.

I must admit that I feel better thinking about a Christianity that can laugh at itself while struggling with the same themes it has failed to address in a Jesus way for centuries. Satire has probably existed a long time as one of humanity’s tools for change, using humor as a way to highlight our failings while making us laugh a little instead of being insulted by overt attempts to unveil our weaknesses. And I think the venue of morning coffee at the kitchen table is a brilliant and familiar choice for these little conversations with Jesus in which the cartoonist extends the words of Jesus into micro-commentaries on how his words could challenge our way of being faithful to Jesus’ ministry.

Having said that I am mindful these cartoons and news stories deliver truth in a way that just might change the way some Christians practice their faith and may even enlighten my own path to the Way doesn’t mean that I will be changing my belief system soon and be converted to this thing called Christianity. I might, however, pick up the Book that reconstructs the oral history of this guy called Jesus and see what its Rabbi Jesus had to say. At the very least, it’s possible that some morning I might just set out an extra cup for Jesus and invite him over so we could chat about something with which I am struggling in my own meditations. Coffee with Jesus’s Jesus seems like a pretty wise and thoughtful guy, a guy I might check in with every once in awhile on my own path to Tao.